sheesh, sorry 'bout that little break in blogging... a lot has happened since my last post... (oops, i forgot that i had to take care of that IRS thing...) brian and i have moved into our new apartment and i've spent the last week trying to turn it into a home... i think i'm doing a pretty good fucking job, too... we didn't get our phone turned on until today so posting and checking email has been impossible... gosh, i have a lot to catch up on... and how about catching you up??? where to begin??? oh gods, i think that i've only pretty much been playing with the apartment... come on, now... lemme think... well, wow... i guess that is pretty much all i've done... haven't really gone out (except for friday night when i went to the club where i normally dance but had the night off... that was totally hot!!!) i've also carried the slight depression over the loss of my computer over into my new space... there are quiet moments in the day that are broken by my exclamation of, "oh, fuck!" when i think of something else that i've lost... the most upsetting of those would be all of my emails from the past seven years, my entire mp3 collection, this huge-ass form that i'd been coding for one of the sites i work on but hadn't backed up, and a bunch of pirated software (which i don't have anymore so, i think, i can't get in trouble for admitting it...) (can i???) (oh, yeah, and does anyone have a snazzy html editor for mac that they'd let me copy 'cause i downloaded a preview of BBEdit and the trial period is about to run out)... i have been doing a lot of writing on paper this week and had been planning on posting it but i just don't think i have the energy... anyway, i'd like to talk more about the apartment, if you don't mind... i really really love it... it's so pretty!!! the only real flaw in the whole thing is the storage situation... we don't have any places to stuff things... we bought a bed with drawers below it which helps and i've added drawers to the bedroom closet and brian's storing a lot of his books in the kitchen until we figure out a better way to handle it... yeah, it's a bump in the road but we're leveling it little by little... okay, i have work to do... will talk to you next month... oh, and chad thinks that the buttons on my page (below) are too big... what do you think???
MONDAY | 09.23.02 | 10:58pm | are they still chasing us??? i got a letter in the mail today from the IRS... it's scary and i think i have it figured out... take a look:
WE ARE PROPOSING CHANGES TO YOUR 2000 TAX RETURN we are proposing changes to your 2000 tax return because information you reported doesn't match what was reported to us by your employers... our proposed amount you owe is $38,090.00... please compare your records with the payer information that begins on page 3.
blah blah blah... okay, um... wait... yes, okay... um... $38,090.00?!?!?!? yup... supposedly this company (a dot com now out of business) which i built office furniture for two years ago reported that i was paid $78,125.00 for my work... now, if i could make that much building office furniture in two weeks, well, ha!!! my web design rates are going up, baby!!! the IRS is a little pissed because i failed to report this income and claimed only to have made $15,117.00 in 2000... (now i'm giving away my real self-worth) i think that the error made (and yes there was an error) must be that the decimal point was put in the wrong place by accident, like perhaps i was paid $781.25 for my work... that seems to make a little more sense to me... so i called up brian's accountant for advise... seems i need to get a real live person from the IRS on the phone (so fucking easy) to tell my tale to... it may also be necessary to get a lawyer... UGH!!! what is going on with my life?!?!?!
WEDNESDAY | 09.18.02 | 01:36am | jesus, god!!! my site looks like shit on a mac!!!
WEDNESDAY | 09.18.02 | 01:33am | once every few days so, i've downloaded some html and ftp shareware onto brian's mac... i really hate working on a mac, but when it's all you got, i guess it's all you got... anyway, now i'll be able to post every now and then and am also able to work on my paying web projects... anyone out there have any good ideas on (legal) ways to make two thousand dollars fast??? i'm open for suggestions...
SATURDAY | 09.14.02 | 09:56pm | life fucking
sucks... my computer is broken... I mean REALLY broken... unfixable... i lost so much that wasn't backed up... ugh!!! back up
your computers NOW!!! this also means, unfortunately, that i cannot blog... no, i don't use blogger or any other "log in and blog" software... i hand-code this shit... i'm having to email dan and ask him to upload this to my site for me... life fucking sucks... so
here's the deal... i need money for a new computer... if you want revolution freedom to live you can send me money... i hate being so
blunt, but any help will, um, help a lot!!! please email me so we can talk more about it...
ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh!!! well, only the gods know when i'll next be able to blog... keep me in your hearts and budgets...
THURSDAY | 09.12.02 | 04:28am | wise man say... i
didn't sing patriotic songs... i didn't take pictures... i didn't wave a flag... but i did cry... i cried a lot... i don't really
have much else to say about yesterday... the fortune cookie i got with lunch yesterday said, "remember always who you are," (it
actually said "remember always who yoware" and i pretty much had to decide between "who you are" and "who you were"...) so i'm going to
take this opportunity to jump on the bandwagon and make a list of 100 things about myself... a lot of it is probably old news, but it's still 100
things... [001] i was born in texas...
MONDAY | 09.09.02 | 06:48am | "i go out walkin' after
midnight" well that was certainly a full day... i was "working" at the qwe're
music fest all evening which was so much fun!!! it was an amazing lineup AND i got a little bit o' sparky in my weekend which is always a
pleasure... then it was off to the storahtelling
tashlich at the chelsea piers with my baby... after that it was the
jewish-arab peace concert (also of storahtelling) where my friend dandelion was spinning world music and where i met the brilliant and
adorable david who's visiting from lost angles... then we were off to cheez whiz for the qwe're after party... then it was a
lovely morning stroll from the east village to the west village to catch the c train back home... i usually wouldn't have done the walk
so late at night but it was irresistible... then it was dealing with the train that never comes and, of course, runs extraordinarily
slow... it's late... we're signing a lease in three hours... ugh...
SATURDAY | 09.07.02 | 08:51pm | quote of the
day in reference to a certain clothing designer/retail store where i used to work: that must be the bitchiest place to work this side of conde nast."
SATURDAY | 09.07.02 | 05:32am | "shaw, we're almost
dancing..." it's late (early) and i must admit that i feel great even though the bar where i work was raided last week and, in
effect, i was not able to dance tonight even after showing up in hopes of making some money... the gods know i need it right now with
all this apartment hoohah... but really, i'm on cloud nine!!! tonight's party was actually very pleasant out at the bar... the whole
"best behavior" thing is kinda nice (in a backward sort of way)... i even ran into this guy and this guy which was a glorious surprise!!! hell,
it was a nice night all together... the thoughts of my new apartment mixed beautifully with the crisp and refreshing rooftop air, the
dance floor with its pumping music, the throng of somewhat disappointed but sexy boys, and the special blue something swirling around
inside my stomach and groin... (is this getting too graphic for you, mom???) the only real downer right now is the financial situation
one is put in when getting a new place... my money problems were already pretty extensive before this, but it's new york... things
will work out... AND i think that the rent party that i'll be throwing will help out a bit!!! (hint)(grin)
FRIDAY | 09.06.02 | 03:52pm | if you're happy and you
know it... clap your fucking hands!!! we got it!!! we're signing a lease on monday and moving in on thursday!!! oh my gods!!!
i can't wait to have you over for dinner!!!
THURSDAY | 09.05.02 | 09:05pm | "well, we're movin' on
up..." i was bored so i decided to go into the city and drop by computer stores so i could dream of and drool over all the new
shiny computers that i can't have... i thought i'd do that, grab a little fast food, head up to central park, lie in sheep meadow and
listen to mp3s... as i ascend the columbus circle subway station my phone rings: we then went out and looked at three whole apartments... at the last one (which is located on the west side in that sort of
non-neighborhood between chelsea and hell's kitchen) i opened the door to an amazing
space which i immediately peed on to claim as mine... it's great!!! i called up brian who then came up, fell in love and started
filling out paperwork... we're told that things look really really good and that we should almost definitely get the place... it's so
exciting!!! such a whirlwind of spontaneity... if all goes well we'll be in by the end of the month... cross your fingers, cast a
good luck spell, say a prayer, meditate, burn a candle and rub your belly for us...
THURSDAY | 09.05.02 | 12:24am | "where do we go from
here???" i'm so tired... i was already going to sleep before i sort of jumped up and said, "blog!" isn't that sick??? i spent
the afternoon and evening on the upper-eastside looking at prospective apartments... ugh... there were definitely some cute spots, but
it's just not the area for us... *sigh* my back hurts...
WEDNESDAY | 09.04.02 | 12:32am | edward norton is a bad
actor... i don't know why everyone is so afraid to say it: edward norton is a bad actor... i can't even believe that my google
search for the phrase "edward norton is a bad actor" did not match any documents (i guess it will in four weeks, though, now won't
it???) i just saw the trailer for his new film "red dragon" and, i'm sorry
but, "edward norton is a bad actor" is the only thought i can think... i remember being really excited to see "american history x" when it opened a few years ago (mostly because the poster turned
me on so much) only to walk out of the theater (turned on, yes) thinking how much i wanted him to disappear... he successfully pulled
of the role of the first nebbishy new york neo-nazi even if it wasn't intended... (how
did he get that academy nomination anyway???) then came "fight club" -
another film guaranteed to make me squirm with sexual pleasure and nausea (AND another occasion for him to avoid the opportunity to
makeout with his male costar)... and while i did walk out with a little wet spot on the crotch of my pants, i was still just angry that
edward norton works... sure there are plenty of sexy, untalented actors working in hollywood, but most of them get shit for it
already... why not edward norton??? i think it's time that i start something positively negative and i choose to pick on him...
edward norton is a bad actor...
TUESDAY | 09.03.02 | 12:09pm | help! police!...
ugh... i just got back from the police department where i looked at a lineup to try and identify one of the guys who may have possibly
been one of my muggers... it was so difficult!!! one guy definitely stood out, but i told the cops that i couldn't be sure if he was
involved... i mean, he could look familiar because he robbed me, because i have seen him on the subway or on the sidewalk, anything...
the whole mugging incident was so fast (not to mention the fact that i had a jacket over my head most of the time) and to say, "yeah,
that's the guy who did this" just seems so impossible... i mean, i don't want to get some suspicious looking kid in trouble just
because i think he looks suspicious... so, i get pulled into a room where they have me look at some photos... here we go again... a
different guy in this lineup seemed familiar... i started doubting myself, thinking that i was just nervous and under pressure to make
an ID so i tried to emphasize as much as possible how nervous and doubtful of the whole thing that i really was... there are just so
many questions flying at you... you don't know what to do...
MONDAY | 09.02.02 | 11:51pm | deuce... oops...
i ran out the door after typing up this morning's entry and didn't even post it... i am so fired!!! brian and i spent our afternoon
dodging the rain and spent our evening at the us open... it was so much more fun
than i thought it would be... i mean, i was excited to go but was really afraid that it would be like my attempts at watching tennis on
tv - you know, watch a game for anywhere up to half an hour before switching to the sunday afternoon movie on upn - except that i wouldn't be able to change the channel... well, it was great!!! i
got to see a couple of matches including andre agassi against jan-michael gambill - two incredibly hot boys
running around a brightly lit court in short shorts hitting balls and grunting... what more could you ask for on a lovely labor day
evening??? in other news: a suspect in my mugging was arrested tonight for attacking and mugging another person in the same subway
station and in the same manner as the incident i was involved in... i have to go to the precinct tomorrow to view a lineup... it's
just like the movies!!!
MONDAY | 09.02.02 | 01:22pm | may i please have another
free drink??? i slept until one o'clock today... i'm a little (but just a little) hungover from last night's blogmeet... yes,
another blogmeet... this time it was in honor of keith who is visiting from lost
angles... you know, it was the usual group of geek-fags (whom i LOVE) (plus jessie, who is visiting from san francisco) allowing themselves to get anywhere from tipsy to toasted with the
excuse of "showing someone from out of town a good time..." i must say, though, that this was one of the more enjoyable parties of this
sort that i've been to... it was lovely meeting these new fellows and spending quality bar time with boys i know, admire, worry about,
love, or secretly (but not too secretly) think about in sexual ways... but hey, it's all in good fun... and thank you, chad, for the surprise...
SUNDAY | 09.01.02 | 12:16pm | "if that's moving up then
i'm moving out" from today's new york times "People move to and remain in Fort Greene because they want to live in a tolerant, relaxed
neighborhood, not a homogeneous one that resists strangers," Jan Rosenberg, a Long Island University sociology professor, concluded in a
1998 report on policy development for the Department of Housing and Urban Development. Fort Greene, named after Nathanael Greene, a
Revolutionary War general who was in charge of building a fort there, has had its ups and downs, but these days it is a hot real estate
market. The neighborhood's diversity, proximity to Manhattan, fine 19th-century town houses, relative affordability and cultural life
draw young professionals, black and white, who are more likely to work on Wall Street or in law firms than recite poetry at
coffeehouses. Added into the mix are the French, who have opened bistros, food shops and sidewalk cafes and also come as tourists,
guidebooks in hand, after reading items about Fort Greene in the Parisian press. "It's this season's hottest neighborhood in Paris,"
said the Rev. David Dyson, minister of the Lafayette Presbyterian Church, who heard about the publicity blitz through one of his French
parishioners. "Fort Greene used to be one of Brooklyn's best-kept secrets. But I guess the secret is out." gee, for a
neighborhood so fucking swell it's amazing how the feeling of security around here is so nonexistent... when a person can't even step
into their subway station without being attacked and robbed or walk down the main drag without dodging bullets, well, i guess it's
difficult to calculate where a monthly rent of $1900 is anywhere near a bargain... for the next month please be prepared to read boring
or possibly hostile talk of everyone's favorite subject: moving... yes, that's right... brian and i have decided to go for it... and i
think we're taking it to manhattan... i promise to try to make it all as entertaining as possible for you... that is all i'm really here
for anyway, isn't it???
MONDAY | 09.30.02 | 11:58pm | hello again...
[002] i was born in january of 1978...
[003] i am an aquarian...
[004] i am
circumcised...
[005] i won't eat beets...
[006] i will eat everything else...
[007] i smoke more than twenty cigarettes a
day...
[008] i love fire...
[009] i hate water...
[010] i love my ass...
[011] i hate my lips...
[012] i listen to music
as often as possible...
[013] i only read books when i'm on the subway...
[014] i don't have any magazine
subscriptions...
[015] i get the keys to my new apartment today...
[016] i am painting the new living room today...
[017] i
consider brown my favorite color...
[018] i consider orange a close second...
[019] i like to buy clothes but i hardly ever
do...
[020] i also really like shoes...
[021] i get turned on by socks...
[022] i get turned off by bare feet...
[023] i
love the male torso...
[024] i especially love it if it is furry...
[025] i am slightly obsessed with jeremy irons...
[026] i
want to have sex with chris meloni...
[027] i really want to have sex with joaquin phoenix...
[028] i really really want to have
sex with vince vaughn...
[029] i will never have sex with any of those people...
[030] i have had five boyfriends...
[031] i
miss my first boyfriend the most because i'll never ever see him again...
[032] i live with my current boyfriend (brian)...
[033]
i have been with brian for almost three years...
[034] i share two cats with brian...
[035] i love dancing but never go to dance
clubs...
[036] i am a naked go-go boy, though...
[037] i am not a whore...
[038] i wear nothing but socks to bed most of the
year...
[039] i have a palm pilot...
[040] i never use my palm pilot but i do use the desktop software...
[041] i need a new
computer...
[042] i need a job...
[043] i am not voting this year...
[044] i am not a fan of george w. bush...
[045] i am
not a fan of michael bloomberg...
[046] i am a fan of britney spears...
[047] i think that she has bigger balls that i
do...
[048] i am a big fan of pink...
[049] i have had pink hair...
[050] i have allowed my hair its natural color and left it
so for almost four months...
[051] i clip hair that grows on my back...
[052] i have a shamrock tattoo on my left
shoulder...
[053] i have a barrel of monkeys chain tattoo on my left forearm...
[054] i have a "tribal" tattoo on my right
shoulder...
[055] i have a japanese kanji tattoo on my right wrist that translates "freedom"...
[056] i have a tattoo that says
"stud puppy" on my left hip...
[057] i have a sun tattoo on my right calf...
[058] i really want a new tattoo...
[059] i have
three ear piercings, a pierced nipple and a pierced libret...
[060] i don't think i'll pierce anything else...
[061] i don't own
anything rainbow colored...
[062] i do like going to pride events...
[063] i went to my first circuit party in march...
[064] i
would be more than happy to attend another...
[065] i don't use any illegal drug regularly...
[066] i used to have a pretty bad
problem with crack cocaine...
[067] i went through three rehab programs and one detox program to get out of it...
[068] i have
never liked to smoke pot...
[069] i really like to take mushrooms, acid and ecstasy...
[070] i hardly ever use those,
though...
[071] i like running...
[072] i haven't been running in several weeks...
[073] i am a wimp when it comes to lifting
things...
[074] i would rather be in the sun than inside...
[075] i have only recently been able to bring myself to step into the
ocean...
[076] i am convinced that the ocean wants to eat me...
[077] i want to eat some ice cream right now...
[078] i always
want to eat some ice cream...
[079] i love cheese...
[080] i would die if i were lactose intolerant...
[081] i would die if i
had to wear a suit all day...
[082] i don't understand the stock market...
[083] i am bad with numbers...
[084] i always
preferred reading and writing...
[085] i know how to punctuate and capitalize but i choose not to...
[086] i wish i could make
money by making art...
[087] i like to draw and paint...
[088] i will begin painting my new apartment this afternoon...
[089] i
like to repeat things that i find exciting...
[090] i am very happy to be moving to manhattan...
[091] i love baking...
[092] i
do not love driving...
[093] i have had two severe car accidents and countless minor accidents...
[094] i do not know how to ride
a bike...
[095] i am still scared to enter subway stations alone after getting mugged in one...
[096] i am a pussy...
[097] i
do not want to touch one...
[098] i have always been gay...
[099] i do not want to have kids...
[100] i am very happy that i
don't have to think of anything else about myself...
- nyc aesthete
hello???hi, dan'l??? this is chris from manhattan
apartments...note: this is a broker that brian had called last week
whom we'd not heard back from...oh, hi there...hey, brian said i should call you so we could possibly look at
apartments...thinking back to yesterday
um, okay,
when???are you available today???well, actually i just got into the city... i'm up around columbus circle...perfect! i'm about a block away from you... walk down to 57th and make a
left... i'll be waiting...ummmmmm, (giggle) okay... i'll be up
soon...
